Join the #metoo Movement

Tarana Burke, the woman behind ‘Me Too’ knew the power of the phrase when she created it 10 years ago. Before #metoo went viral, she was using “me too” to reach women of color who survived sexual violence. 

And, it is important to remember that harassment comes in forms in addition to than sexual harassment. Anyone who is targeted should join the Me Too movement. There is no doubt strength in numbers, as uncovered in Lindy West’s Op-Ed piece, should encourage executives and boards to become even more aware of and sensitive to the issue. Now is a golden opportunity for a flood of harassment to get flushed out.

As I wrote in one of my blogs, the issues of sexual harassment are prevalent amongst men as well. Everyone needs to step out and allow his or her voice to be heard. In her recent Op-Ed article, Margaret Renkl describes just how effectively movements succeed when the number of activists increases.

This is already beginning to happen as evidenced in the New York Times article by Adam Nagourney and Jennifer Medina, showing that 140 women have already come forward in California alone!

In another New York Times article by Emily Steel and Michael S. Schmidt, Fox News demonstrated just how disingenuous the Murdock’s were and still are. The fact that Fox News did not deal with O’Reilly at the same time they dealt with Roger Ailes begs the question – why should we believe them now? Miraculously, he was fired, but only after more previously known and covered up incidents were revealed. Fox’s words ring hollow for most women, who were too afraid to come forward after O’Reilly’s contract renewal.

In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I discuss the importance of the bystander becoming an activist. The time is ripe for all harassed people to step forward and expose these predators for who they are.

“Bullying and Prejudice in Our Public Life Sets a National Tone”

When John McCain, Barack Obama and George W. Bush publicly appeal to Americans, as McCain pleaded “not to loose our soul”, it is safe to say that democracy is at huge risk.

Everyone should listen to how eloquently they described what is occurring, and the fragility of the checks and balances that most were naively banking on to avoid not what could happen, but what is happening. These thoughts are further echoed in Thomas B. Edsall’s informed opinion in the New York Times yesterday.

I have been regularly blogging about the dangers that the current administration has been creating since its swearing in.

A major factor is, as Bush laid out, “Bullying and prejudice in our public life sets a national tone, provides permission for cruelty and bigotry, and compromises the moral education of children.”

In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I discuss the many ways bullying undermines society’s ability to champion inclusivity and diversity, two notions Trump cannot embrace.

Photo credit: Wikimedia.com

Perks at Work Alone Won’t Change Toxic Cultures

With the spotlight brightening on the need for a return to civility in society, especially in the workplace, as the injustices pile up, as I have highlighted in my blogs, the focus must remain on the unnecessary stress employees endure. In a recent article by Alec Gewirtz in Thrive Global, a number of Fortune 500 companies are making an effort to ease these stresses by including calming activities and other recreational outlets to their employees’ while at work. After all, studies have shown that relieving stress at work increases productivity.

I would suggest, however, that before you ‘buy the ping pong table’, to be sure that the culture of your organization is psychologically healthy enough to successfully implement these perks. In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I discuss the many ways bullying produces stress in the workplace. I also offer suggestions on how to handle these difficult situations.

Photo credit: Wikimedia.org

Harassment - Abuse - Extortion Runs Rampant in Workplaces

In a Washington Post article, Danielle Paquette describes the depressing truth about sexual harassment in America. What is even more depressing is that this same truth holds exists for all forms of abuse, harassment, extortion and exploitation in the workplace. I have been harping about this for close to a decade. In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I articulated these very points, something I have continued featuring in articles, and in blogs on my website.

Actor James Van Der Beek reveals he faced sexual harassment by ‘older, powerful men,’ in wake of Weinstein scandal. "I’ve had my ass grabbed by older, powerful men," he wrote. In yesterday’s blog, I discuss Terry Crews’ tale as well as sharing my own experience.

Alyssa Rosenberg’s Washington Post article underscores the complexity of this societal scourge in her headline, ‘For the Harvey Weinstein scandal to mean anything, it will have to get a lot worse.’ I'm disgusted by the allegations against Harvey Weinstein. But if we're ever to have a shot at addressing sexual harassment and sexual assault, we have to accept that he's not an exception. Unfortunately, it’s not just Harvey Weinstein. In fact, his actions can no longer even be considered rare. He just happened to get caught. The latest top Hollywood executive under scrutiny is Amazon Studio’s chief Roy Price, suspended amid sexual harassment allegations, as revealed in another Washington Post article by Mary Hui.

Anyone who has been abused, harassed, and bullied needs to come forward. The more that do will cause the bullies and predators to think twice before they do it again.

Author: Andrew Faas

Photo credit: Vimeo.com

MEN GET SEXUALLY HARASSED, TOO

In a Washington Post article by Emily Yahr, actor Terry Crews says, “a ‘high level Hollywood executive’ groped him. He continued, “This whole thing with Harvey Weinstein is giving me PTSD. Why? Because this kind of thing happened to ME," the former NFL player tweeted.

Mr. Crews, in relaying his reaction to the Weinstein scandal, stated that he is still haunted by what happened to him, and has expressed what most men and women experience long after the event, sometimes for the rest of their lives. I can speak to this because, like Crews, “this kind of thing happened to ME!"

On two occasions, my former co -author, the highly regarded bullying expert Barbara Coloroso, made sexual advances towards me - one verbal and the other physical. In one of the incidences she bragged to me that she had seduced a gay Canadian Olympian, after she taught him how to kayak. Based on her aggressiveness with me I am sure we were not the only ones she harassed. She is in the same category as Trump, Roger Ailes, Bill O’Reilly and Bill Cosby pathetic predators.

After I rejected her physical advance, Coloroso started a campaign to discredit me, enlisting The Workplace Bullying Institute’s Gary Namie, the Toronto Star, and Google as weapons. I wrote a blog about my experience, but even now they continue to bully me.

My initial reaction was to expose what was happening to me and why. Almost everyone from whom I sought advice on this discouraged me from pursuing this course of action. Upon reflection, they were wrong, and I was wrong in following it. Rather I sought remedy through the legal process. Legally I won, but emotionally I lost. 

Until the conclusion of the court case, through my books, including From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, and in articles and blogs, I gave people who are targeted hope. I am an expert on the topic of bullying, abuse and harassment, and had deep enough pockets to fight it. As I indicated earlier, emotionally I lost; and the tragedy of this is my inability, in good conscience to continue to give those who are targeted hope. 

The Weinstein story may have a good result is giving people the courage to come forward with what happened in the past and ideally exposing bullies and predators immediately after it occurs. 

This should also motivate organizations to provide their employees with ombudspersons to as a method by which they can seek advice and support on both report and seek recourse. As indicated in yesterday’s blog Human Resources just doesn’t cut it. 

Photo credit: Gage Skidmore

Human Resources – Part of the Problem or Part of the Solution?

An article by Claire Cain Miller in the New York Times about reporting incidents of sexual harassment in the workplace provides both a real picture of what has been happening and what continues going on, as well as some sound advice on what to do if you are ever a victim.

The culprit, other than the predator, is the Human Resources Department, who according to the research I have done for my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, is part of the problem versus part of the solution in the majority of organizations. I fully concur that women do not report sexual harassment primarily because, as Ms. Miller points out, “mostly they fear retaliation, and for good reason, research shows”.

The suggestion that organizations provide an Ombuds person is one of the most effective ways for people to come forward. We should also note that this goes beyond sexual harassment. The same dynamics occur with other forms of harassment and abuse.

Photo credit: Nick Youngson

FOXES IN THE HEN HOUSE

In the New York Times article by Jodi Kantor and Megan Twohey, Harvey Weinstein is exposed as a sexual predator. I wrote about this same dynamic when it happened at Fox Media. These lurid activities occurred within a culture of silence.

It is encouraging that Mr. Weinstein says he is working towards mending his way, admitting that it won’t be easy, in a carefully crafted statement. The good thing that could come from this is giving those who have been targeted the courage to come forward to expose these predators who feel they can abuse with immunity. Like Fox Media - there are more ‘Foxes in the hen house’.

The Times also discusses the internal board scrambling resulting from these latest revelations. The moves came as employees and business partners of the company voiced concern about sexual harassment allegations, revealed in a New York Times investigation. It begs the question, after going on for 30 years, and the executives and the board didn’t know about it, how far removed are they, and what else is out there that they don’t know?

Harvey Weinstein embodies a culture whose power is on the wane, as discussed in Ann Horniday’s Washington Post article. The sexism Weinstein embodies has been reflected in the ‘male gaze’ of Hollywood movies. But that gaze is beginning to wander.

In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I explain how a toxic culture creates cover-ups and denials around sexual harassment. I also advise on what specific steps employees facing these horrendous situations can and should do.

Photo credit: Vimeo.com

The Queen Bee in the Workplace

Olga Khazan’s updated article on women who bully, published in The Atlantic last month, is reflective of the dynamics I outline in my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, where I explain how a toxic culture creates and supports bullying.

Women are often singled out as being difficult to work for or with, but the dynamics that cause this are based in fear, just as they are with men.

The way that these situations can be made healthy is for upper management to agree that the culture of their organization must adopt the ethic of reciprocity in all of their interactions with all stakeholders, especially fellow employees. This paves the way for the creation and sustainability of psychologically safe workplaces.

Author: Andrew Faas

Photo credit: gratisography.com

A TIMELY LESSON ON LEADERSHIP

Just like a breath of fresh air, Lt. Gen. Jay Silveria firmly reminded his audience of some 4000 cadets of the Air Force’s staunch belief in “the power of diversity”. He further insisted that “small thinking and horrible ideas” had no place there. His actual remarks, included in Jonah Engle Bromwich’s New York Times column, are very powerful and should be studied by everyone in a leadership position. His message was very well framed, open, honest and direct. Although he occasionally referred to his crib notes, the message came from his heart - something that those who heard it will remember for the rest of their lives.

This belief system is in sharp contrast to the toxic cultures that have been exposed and about which I have written at such companies as Uber, Fox News, Wells Fargo and Volkswagen in terms of dealing with critical situations. In all of those cases, as in most that we see related to wrongdoing, discrimination, and harassment, they first deny, deny, and deny again; and then leadership claims no knowledge of the issue and/or they cover it up, versus tackling it head-on in an open direct non-threatening way. But these companies must espouse a psychologically healthy workplace, where there are ground rules that must be followed; and if you don’t like them, get out.

In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I discuss how strong leadership from the top is essential for creating and maintaining psychologically healthy organizations.

Photo credit: United States Air Force Academy

The Importance of Learning to Civilly and Effectively Communicate Disagreement

With all of the noise about the National Football League, the message in Bret Stevens lecture published in the New York Times is that the most effective way to resist, protect and defend democracy and a civilized society is to effectively communicate disagreement. Today, most of what we are hearing is the ranting of polarized positions.

Whenever I engage in a debate I ask myself if there is a one percent possibility that my position is wrong. If the answer to this is yes, then I owe it to myself and to the people implicated by the debate to consider the opposing view. What is required here is the ability of people to have critical discussions when they disagree, as discussed in N. Gregory Mankiw’s article in the Times. Unfortunately, this is outside of most people's comfort zones. I believe that if more of us used the power of Emotional Intelligence, coupled with the Golden Rule, they can revive the art of disagreement. Not having constructive debates puts at risk the voices of reason, and gives licence to the loudest belligerent voice in the room, which undermines the very essence of democracy.

In my book, From Bully to Bull’s-Eye: Move Your Organization Out of the Line of Fire, I explain how taking civil action is critical to changing a culture. The NFL exemplified this action as they knelt down during the playing of the National Anthem.

Photo credit: Aidan Jones